the Marathon of Emotions

Why that title? You ask.

It was only last Sun­day when I parted with my camp life which I had been liv­ing with for the past two and a half months. Liv­ing behind all my dear friends, dorm mates, teach­ers and instruc­tors alike, wasn’t easy, obvi­ously. It was hard espe­cially, to deal with the sud­den change of envi­ron­ment. My mind was expe­ri­enc­ing the iner­tia phe­nom­e­non, hes­i­tat­ing to let go of it’s attach­ments to my camp life. The sud­den break from rou­tine lifestyle was hard to accept.

With­out mercy, the Board of Exam­i­na­tions decided to release the SPM 2006 results the very next day. I remem­ber sit­ting on my study table that morn­ing, think­ing of all the things me and my friends did dur­ing NS while other 18 year-olds nation­wide are strug­gling to pass time before the 10am results release. Lit­tle did I worry about the results which were com­ing out in a few hours. At that time, my mind was still drift­ing between camp and real life. I wasn’t ready to face the results. Not because I was afraid, but more of that I did not care.

What­ever will be, will be, I thought. I can’t even remem­ber how I did in the exams, which sub­ject I was ini­tially wor­ried for and which I was con­fi­dent for and so on. I wasn’t until the moment my dad droved into the school gates, look­ing at the expres­sions of those walk­ing out where I started to get ner­vous. I dis­em­barked and walked boldly towards the moment of truth.

Nonethe­less, I was sat­is­fied with my results. Although they were not really up to the ‘I’ll get schol­ar­ships for sure!’ mark, it was already more than I had expected. Dad was OK with it, and mum, she even tried to con­sole me in case I was dejected..!

So, I spent the rest of the day inform­ing rel­a­tives and friends alike of my results, with rou­tine replies of ‘Con­grats!’ ‘Well done’ and what­not. And also ask­ing around my cir­cle of friends for their results and plans ahead.

That after­noon itself, I flew to Kuala Lumpur to see mum before I could really analyse and think about my results. Yeah, I was glad to meet mum again, after three weeks. Rel­a­tives com­mented that I had put on a few more lay­ers of tan, which I took as a com­pli­ment. While my lil cousins saw me as a huge soft toy, curi­ously stroking my shaved head.

And now, a week later, I’m back home. Life’s made a bor­ing turn though. I called up my dri­ving instruc­tor this after­noon to arrange for my dri­ving course, finally. As such, I will be attend­ing some sort of dri­ving class this Sat­ur­day after which, I’ll get to drive for the first time. After wait­ing for my birth­day and later, National Ser­vice, I’m finally on my way for a dri­ving license.

Until then, wish me luck!

by shenghan in General, Life on 19th March, 2007 at 10pm, Monday, March 19th, 2007 10:25 pm GMT +8


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  1. Hui Ting from Kay Eal said

    Speak­ing about results..
    My friends and I already planned to go to school by a pub­lic cab to get our results. I told my mum about the plan a day before and she did some­thing out of the norm, which was vol­un­teer­ing her­self to drive me there. I do not want her to be involved in such sit­u­a­tion to avoid some drama going on in the school. Finally she agreed on terms I sms my results once I received it. The next day, my friends and I was almost 2 hours late to school. When I saw my slip, I almost cried.…well of dis­s­a­point­ment.… I aimed for straight As and well, my results clearly failed y expec­ta­tions.
    Then, my friends and I hung out in Mid Val­ley until 10pm. I just did every­thing to clear my mind from all this results havoc. I ate a lot on that day. Fried chicken, fries, coke, ice-cream (hell expen­sive from baskin rob­bins). All unhealthy food. Then I even watched Bridge to Ter­abithia in the cin­ema there. After all these, I just felt slightly bet­ter but god, IT’S TERRIBLE!!
    Time to face the truth. When I came home, my mum asked about it, my sis­ter, brother, rel­a­tives.… Just felt damn upset when I saw their dis­s­a­pointed faces.…. ” ah…all As but one C??” “what did you get for that soli­tary C” ” It’s not that bad, it’s only a C.….Think about all those As you get.…” I hated it. That night I soaked my pil­lows until 3am.
    Maybe it is already good but I had expected more. Hon­estly, I am no intel­li­gent dude but I am hell lot hard­work­ing than the oth­ers. Just see what I deserve for putting so much effort on my stud­ies? A damn, insult­ing, ugly and hideous C. Goddamnit.

  2. ember said

    What is intel­li­gent if scor­ing all A’s but miss­ing out one isn’t? C’mon, its good and we all know it. Hey, at least you’re bet­ter off than me. =)

    Any­way, if i were you, I’d put that behind and look for­ward, like every­one else would tell you to do. I didn’t plan on tak­ing the results seri­ously any­way but thats just me.

    Get your­self a clear road ahead and you can for­get about your results, although I think it is to be proud of. XD good luck man!

  3. Hui Ting from Kay Eal said

    Hey dude. I am per­fectly okay now. Thanks for the con­cern any­way. And one thing is for sure…my results are noth­ing to be proud of. Because thou­sands of peo­ple out there are bet­ter than me. So, I don’t really care about it after quite some time. Con­vince me, I won’t die because of that right? Haha!!! Any­way I for­got to gongrat­u­late you on your excel­lent per­for­mance in SPM. so, congrats!!

  4. ember said

    If you’d ask me, the rea­son I’m proud of my results is that efforts, my efforts, had been made to achieve it, not because how many thou­sands of peo­ple are bet­ter than me.

    Thanks any­way. XD

  5. Wei fan said


  6. unknown said

    sheng han ar.… dun show off

  7. ember said

    Ah hog ar.. I’m not show­ing off la. Which part of the post deserved that accusation?

  8. unknown said

    ah hog?? who that and not me who say 1, is other person

  9. ember said

    Khing vui then. XD I know it’s you. I saw you typ­ing this. In fact I’m look­ing you right now. Stop using Swinburne’s PC labs to search for my name. wua­haha. XD